presented by gray deering, who has mastered the art of the web.
disclaimer: whether you're from earth or alternia, these ^ are not what anyone looks like. i just liked them.
regardless: yes, aliens are real.
- what kind of aliens are we talking about. where are they from.
there are humans, from earth, and trolls, from alternia.
- how do we communicate.
apparently, trolls and humans somehow developed the exact same language (known as english to humans, not sure what the troll word for it is). that said, trolls also have alternian, and i haven't seen a troll who speaks spanish, german, russian, etc. but at the same time one spoke a little bit of swedish or something, so? while there are some cultural barriers, it seems to mostly come in the form of terminology used. otherwise, media, wildlife, etc. seem to mirror each other a lot, besides in their usage of violence.
- what do they look like.
there are some similarities between the two. for one, both species are bipedal, and have overall similar anatomy and facial structures. both species have hair, opposable thumbs, two eyes, etc. but there are some key differences.
humans are mammals. as such they have mammalian features, being softer and lacking insect-like qualities like those little legs on their ribs or whatever. their teeth and fingernails tend to be blunter than those of a troll's, and their skin, hair, and eyes all come in a variety of different colors naturally. they have no horns. also, all of them have red blood, and none of them live in the ocean.
trolls are insect-like. they're a little tougher, and tend towards having sharp fangs and nails. all of them that i've seen also have horns. they all have gray skin and, for the most part, black hair, but some of them seem to either dye them or just kind of naturally have wildly colored hair. they also have different blood colors (including green, red, brown, purple, blue, different blue) that affect their place in society. some blood colors are illegal. some blood colors live in the ocean. the pink ones were usually in charge.
usually, someone around is willing to share a picture of themselves. if you're curious to see an alien, ask and ye shall likely receive.
- what should i, a human, know about trolls.
trolls have a violent culture, even next to humans. while i don't claim to know everything, they lived under an empirical system, where, like i said, blood color affected how you were treated. sometimes they still kind of struggle with the idea that that stuff doesn't really matter any more. oh, also, some of them have powers. the red ones talk to dead people. plus, they are likely stronger than you. if you pick a fight with one (don't.) you should be ready to deal with the consequences. take my word for it.
p.s. careful saying you hate them. they have a different romance system and may think that you're hitting on them.
- what should i, a troll, know about humans.
humans had different social systems than trolls, obviously, and many different governments. as a general rule of thumb we disagree with the idea that anyone deserves to die for being a lower caste or "mutant" (even if those mean different things to us). that includes the writer of this guide. also, we have a different romance system than you do. generally, we only consider "romance" to be the equivalent of what you guys call redrom / matespritship, which we call being boyfriends/girlfriends/partners, or wives/husbands/spouses. most of us don't do the kismesis, moirail, whatever the other one is thing. but maybe you'll get lucky, who knows.
- okay. should i know anything else?
those are the basics, and i think everything that you really ought to know going in. if you don't believe me it's not really my problem. you'll figure it out.
- wait, how did we connect to the same memo/game.
no one knows.
- can i bang the aliens.
yeah. but i'm not going into that kind of detail. figure it out on your own. weirdo.
so that's my guide to aliens. hope it helped. if it didn't, that sucks, i guess. if there's anything you think i should add let me know and maybe someday i'll add it in. probably not. i never claimed this guide was going to be comprehensive.
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